4.8 The Mountain and the Viper
Ramsay sends Theon to trick his father’s men at Moat Cailin and is successful in doing so. In return, Roose acknowledges him as a real Bolton. Petyr faces enquiry regarding Lysa’s death, which he claims is suicide. Sansa reveals her true identity to them after being summoned but lies about her aunt’s murder to save him. Ser Barristan receives a copy of Ser Jorah’s royal pardon from King’s Landing, revealing his initial role as a spy. Daenerys banishes him from Meereen. Arya and the Hound reach the Vale, but is greeted with the news that her aunt has died three days prior. The day has come for Tyrion’s judgment. Oberyn proves his mettle with his swift moves, severely wounding the Mountain and knocking him down. He constantly prods him to confess to raping and murdering his sister. He does, right after tripping the Dornish prince, knocking off his teeth, and squeezing his head through his eyes until it burst like a squashed watermelon. Tywin sentences his own son Tyrion to death, much to Cersei’s joy and Jaime’s dismay.
Ooh, Little Dove, you pretty little liar. Someone’s learning the tricks of the trade, and I’m beaming from ear to ear now like a proud uncle. And I love her new outfit! What’s worse than being in the friend zone? Well, a temporary restraining order. Tough luck, Ser Jorah. Better luck next time? I pity the guy, though. I think he fell hard for Dragon Mama, but a relationship built on a foundation of lies is meant to eventually fail, you know. It’s fun seeing Tyrion and Prince Charming just hanging out. There should be a spinoff of the Lannisters in their teenage years. I’d love to see them annoy teenage Queen B to death. And now on to the big event. Sorry, but I’ve run out of expletives. It’s not every day that you see a guy’s head being smashed like a watermelon like that. I had to see the scene over and over again, not because of the gore, but because despite reading spoilers that this is going to happen, it was pretty hard to believe, even after seeing it over and over again. Oops, the producers did it again. I’m left trembling and speechless. DAFUQ did I just watch? Great show, guys. Great show.
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